Film Review: MACHETE (2010)

Directors: Ethan Maniquis, Robert Rodriguez
Writers: Robert Rodriguez, Álvaro Rodríguez
Running time: 105 mins (approx)
Certification (UK): 18

Genre: Action/Crime/Thriller
UK Release date: 26^th November 2010

Watched on Freeview PVR Saturday 19^th October 2013.

PLEASE NOTE: THERE MAY BE UNINTENTIONAL SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

This one has been on my list for some time and I’ve had it on my PVR disc for a while now. Finally an opportune time-slot came up and I got the chance to give it a viewing. I have to say it was everything I had expected and more. A lot more humour in it than anticipated which was very welcome, with one particular set of scenes featuring our hero and the bodyguards of one of the bad guys that I found very amusing. I find that sometimes these films take themselves far too seriously and that is usually to their detriment; not the case here. Although not as polished as I would have expected, I still liked it despite the rough hewn edges to the production.

Decent performances all round with Danny Trejo doing a very decent job as the lead, Machete Cortez. Also on the good-guys side we had Jessica Alba as Satrana and Michelle Rodriguez as Luz, nice eye candy but without too much substance. Chief among the bad guys were; Robert De Niro as Senator John McLaughlin, Steven Seagal as Rogelio Torrez and Jeff Fahey as Michael Booth; the pick of these being Fahey, mainly because he had a lot more screen time. Over all I found it a very entertaining film that didn’t tax the little grey cells too much. It’s pretty gory so definitely not one for the squeamish; just remember to check your brain in at the door and I’m certain you’ll enjoy Machete.

SteelMonster’s verdict: RECOMMENDED

My score: 6.6/10.

IMDb Score: 6.7/10 (at the time of going to press).
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0985694/

MetaScore: 60/100: (at the time of going to press).

Rotten Tomatoes ‘Tomatometer’ Score: 73/100: (at the time of going to press).

Rotten Tomatoes ‘Audience’ Score: 63/100: (at the time of going to press).
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/machete/

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http://facebook.com/andy.steel3

LINKS:
(Note: All were working at the time of going to press)
Trailer:

Film Review: THE MERCENARY (a.k.a. THE LAZARUS PAPERS) (2010)

Directors: Jeremiah Hundley & Daniel Zirilli
Running time: 90 mins (approx)
Certification (UK): 18

Genre: Action/Drama/Supernatural
USA Release date: 2010

Watched on DVD Monday 5^th September 2011.

PLEASE NOTE: THERE MAY BE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

The only reason I watched this is because one of the directors of the company I work for asked me to look at it. It had confused him and so he wondered if I could make any sense out of it. Well, I could, but it’s so badly made that I really struggled. The acting, the script… everything about was amateurish and didn’t really have any quality to it. More of my thoughts after this brief summary.

When a village in South East Asia is attacked by a mercenary, Sebastian Riker, he murders the village holy man and healer, Aroon, and takes a girl, Nana to work as a prostitute. Little does he know but Aroon cannot die, his powers will not allow that until he can find someone to take his place. So he wanders the land looking for such a person. Some time later Nana is addicted to heroin and working for Riker as a prostitute. He has a scam, luring unsuspecting American tourists over with the promise of a marriage to one of his girls. Of course they get robbed and left in the street. Terminal patient Lonny Smith is such a victim, but he doesn’t know it when he meets Nana. She is struck by his honesty and decides to break away from Riker. They go to a refugee camp near her former village, but Riker is on their trail and he wants his cash. I’ll leave it there… I’ve probably made it sound a lot more interesting than it really is! I don’t think the Spoiler Police will be bothered this time though.

As I’ve already said, this is not a very good film and one I really cannot recommend by any stretch of the imagination. It’s very poorly produced and, I’m guessing, had a tiny budget. I’ll just give a few name checks so you can see just who you’re not going to see acting pretty woefully. Danny Trejo played Aroon, Gary Daniels played Sebastian Riker, Krystal Vee played Nana and Johnny Lee Played Lonny Smith. Oh, and I should mention a small part for Damon Whitaker (Forest Whitaker ‘s brother) as Dock Bagley (a cop).

My Score: 3.3/10

IMDb Score: 2.5/10 (based on 329 votes at the time of going to press).
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1144884/

Rotten Tomatoes Score: N/A (No listing).

LINKS:
Trailer:

Film Review: PREDATORS (2010) [REWATCH]

Director: Nimród Antal
Running time: 103 mins (approx)
Certification (UK): 15

Genre: Action/Adventure/Sci-Fi
UK Release date: 8^th July 2010

Watched on Sky+ Sunday 12^th June 2011.

PLEASE NOTE: THERE MAY BE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

Having seen this at the cinema almost a year ago it finally arrived on in the TV schedules. Since I quite enjoyed it first time around I thought I’d give it a second look. Below is pretty much my original review with just a couple of adjustments and a slightly revised score. On second viewing it didn’t quite have the impact it did first time around, but it was still entertaining where it needed to be and I finally figured out just what Noland added to the plot.

The film opens with a man dressed in battle fatigues falling, he is unconscious, but comes round. Shortly before impact with the jungle covered ground below a parachute opens, but he still lands with a bone-crunching thud. Others land around him and are, at first, aggressive towards each other until the first one persuades them it would be better to band together. They are all from the less desirable side of the tracks, there’s a mercenary, a convict, a sniper from Guatemala, a yakuza, a freedom fighter from Chechnya, a kidnapper, a religious fighter and a doctor. It soon becomes apparent that they are not on Earth and that they are being hunted by an unseen enemy. One by one they are eliminated by this foe. Eventually a plan is formed to defeat them and get off this planet.

Very reminiscent of the original film, Predator (1987) starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, but maybe without the same impact. All very well done with some excellent special effects and CGI. Decent performances from all involved. Honourable mentions go to, Adrien Brody as Royce, Topher Grace as Edwin, Alice Braga as Isabelle, Walton Goggins as Stans, Oleg Taktarov as Nikolai, a nice cameo from Laurence Fishburne as Noland, Danny Trejo as Cuchillo, Louis Ozawa Changchien as Hanzo and Mahershalalhashbaz Ali as Mombasa.

Although not as good as the 1987 original, I quite enjoyed this reboot. Having seen several films featuring the Predators since then, they don’t have the fright factor they used to. But it was an entertaining film with some great action sequences and a nice twist at the end. It’s not the best film in the world, but over all recommended for those who like this sort of thing (I did). Oh, and it ends wide open for a sequel.

My score: 7.1/10

LINKS:
(RT=Rotten Tomatoes)
IMDb Page: http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1424381/
RT Page: http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/10012256-predators/
Official Site: http://www.predators-movie.com/
Trailer: