Film Review: HAYWIRE (2011)

Director: Steven Soderbergh
Writer: Lem Dobbs
Running time: 89 mins (approx)
Certification (UK): 15

Genre: Action/Adventure/Thriller
UK Release date: 18^th January 2012

Watched on Sky+ Saturday 10^th November 2012.

PLEASE NOTE: THERE MAY BE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

This is a film that I’ve heard very mixed reviews about. My buddy Mark really didn’t like it… this has the advantage of him not giving away a lot of spoilers; as he’s prone to do when he does like something. With us having differing tastes when it comes to movies on occasion I decided to give it the once over and decide for myself. Well, I have to say that to some extent Mark was right; it’s certainly not a great film. I’ll tell you why after this very brief summary.

We begin in a diner where Mallory Kane has stopped while fleeing from exactly what we don’t yet know. Aaron arrives and tries to take her with him. She resists, there’s a fight and she escapes with one of the customers, a young man called Scott. She begins to talk about events and people that have brought her to this point and we go into flashback mode. The upshot of which is that she is a freelance covert operative has been set up and attempts have been made on her life… It’s time for payback and it will be brutal!... I guess that sums it up really.

It’s a film that in the beginning seems extremely incoherent and that’s no mistake… it is! The disjointed musical score by David Holmes doesn’t help one bit either. As far as performances go, well Gina Carano did a reasonable job as Mallory Kane; I know she did most of her own stunt work which is quite impressive, but her acting skills may still need a little work. We then have the likes of Channing Tatum as Aaron, Michael Douglas as Alex Coblenz, Antonio Banderas as Rodrigo, Ewan McGregor as Kenneth, Michael Fassbender as Paul, Bill Paxton as John Kane and Michael Angarano as Scott who all played their parts well, but over all, for me, it didn’t quite work.

I have come across several of these films with a decent cast but I well know that this is no guarantee of a decent film. Yes, the fight scenes are pretty spectacular, but no more so than those in the ‘Bourne’ films. I found the plot far too complex and this wasn’t helped by the characterisations which I found it very hard to engage with. It does all tie up quite neatly in the end, but it touches every single base on the way there. The film is only an hour and a half long and it seemed a lot longer than that by the time the final credits rolled… This is not a good sign I’m afraid and so this one does not get my seal of approval.

SteelMonster’s verdict: NOT RECOMMENDED

My score: 4.3/10

IMDb Score: 5.9/10 (based on 42,091 votes at the time of going to press).
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1506999/

MetaScore: 67/100: (Based on 40 critic reviews provided by Metacritic.com at the time of going to press).

Rotten Tomatoes ‘Tomatometer’ Score: 80/100 (based on 174 reviews counted at the time of going to press).

Rotten Tomatoes ‘Audience’ Score: 40/100 ‘Liked it’ (based on 37,015 user ratings counted at the time of going to press).
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/haywire_2011/

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http://facebook.com/andy.steel3

FAVOURITE QUOTES:
[first lines]
Mallory Kane: Shit.
[deep breath]
Aaron: [sitting down] What the hell are you doing out here? I had to drive all night. I'm hung over as shit. And you're really starting to cut into my vacation time, so can we go please?

Aaron: This your idea of relaxing? Wine and gun maintenance?
Mallory Kane: There's another glass in the kitchen.
Aaron: You gonna leave your name and number afterwards?

Mallory Kane: I don't even know how to play that. I don't wear the dress. Make Paul wear the dress.
Kenneth: Well, I'll ask.

Coblenz: In the auction business they have an expression called the "halo effect". Do you know what that is? It's when an object or work of art is more desirable because of its prior ownership. It's very rare when it happens, you know? Maybe once in a lifetime. Gotta catch it when you can.
Mallory Kane: [circling him]
Coblenz: Look, I got plenty of drama in my own office.

[last lines]
Rodrigo: Shit.

LINKS:
(Note: All were working at the time of going to press)
Official Site: http://www.haywiremovie.com
Trailer:

Film Review: PUSS IN BOOTS (2011)

Director: Chris Miller
Writers: Charles Perrault (Character), Tom Wheeler (screenplay/story), Brian Lynch (story), William Davies (Story)
Running Time: 90 mins (approx)
Certification (UK): U

Genre: Animation/Comedy/Adventure
UK Release Date: 9^th December 2011

Watched on Sky+ Friday 17^th August 2012.

PLEASE NOTE: THERE MAY BE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

As a cat lover I felt I couldn’t pass on a chance to see this one. For me, Puss in Boots was always one of my favourite characters in the Shrek movies and so a spin-off was inevitable. Did it live up to expectations?... Well, I’ll tell you after this very brief summary.

In this film we hear about the early years of Puss; how he was brought up in an orphanage and about his childhood best friend Humpty Dumpty. It all went sour when Humpty duped Puss into helping him on a bank job that theft him in jail and Puss on the run. They had not spoken for many years when they are brought together by one Kitty Softpaws; a feline femme fatal if ever I saw one! Humpty wants Puss to help him pull the ultimate heist, he wants to steal the magic beans, grow the beanstalk and lift the golden goose. The trouble is the beans are in the possession of the notorious Jack and Jill! Can they get the beans, grow the stalk, steal the goose and restore Puss’s reputation? Well, I think you probably guessed it; I’m not going to tell you here. The Spoiler Police (Storybook Division) are getting tougher since they had training from the Grimms.

Well animated with a nice musical score by Henry Jackman; the quality of the picture is great as well (no 3D here). Performance wise; well it wouldn’t be Puss in Boots without the voice of Antonio Banderas in the starring role, and he really nailed it again here! Salma Hayek did a very decent job as Kitty Softpaws and Zach Galifianakis was adequate as Humpty Dumpty (more on him later). Honourable mentions go to; Billy Bob Thornton as Jack, Amy Sedaris as Jill, Constance Marie as Imelda and Guillermo del Toro as Moustache Man/Comandate.

Although, in parts it was pretty funny and there were some nice one-liners and the usual subtle references to other movies; I felt there was something missing (apart from Shrek… and Donkey…etc). At the end of the day I put it down to the fact that I didn’t find the character of Humpty Dumpty very convincing. His motivations seemed very vague for the amount of effort he put in. This aside, it’s well made, pretty enjoyable and it’s got Antonio Banderas as Puss in Boots! Could have been better though.

SteelMonster’s verdict: RECOMMENDED (just).

My Score 6.4/10

IMDb Score: 6.7/10 (based on 49,821 votes at the time of going to press).
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0448694/

MetaScore: 65/100: (Based on 24 critic reviews provided by Metacritic.com at the time of going to press).

Rotten Tomatoes ‘Tomatometer’ Score: 83/100 (based on 136 reviews counted at the time of going to press).

Rotten Tomatoes ‘Audience’ Score: 70/100 ‘Liked It’ (based on 66,712 user ratings counted at the time of going to press).
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/1209933-puss_in_boots/

If you’re crazy enough… You can find me on Facebook at:
http://facebook.com/andy.steel3

FAVOURITE QUOTES:
Puss in Boots: You have made the cat angry. You do not want to make the cat angry!

Kitty Softpaws: That's a lot of heel for a guy, don't you think?

Humpty Dumpty: First rule of Bean Club, don't talk about Bean Club. The second rule of Bean Club... don't talk about Bean Club.

Jill: [dangles Puss over a canyon] Is it true a cat always lands on its feet?
Puss in Boots: No! That is just a rumour, spread by dogs!

Kitty Softpaws: [In a calm voice] You owe me.
Puss in Boots: I owe you?
Kitty Softpaws: [starts to flirt with Puss] Uh-huh. You hit me in the head with a guitar.
Puss in Boots: I, uh, regret the guitar.
Kitty Softpaws: Okay, I forgive you.

LINKS:
(Note: All were working at the time of going to press)
Official Site: http://www.pussinbootsthemovie.com/
Trailer:

Film Review: SHREK FOREVER AFTER (2010)

Director: Mike Mitchell
Running time: 90 mins (approx)
Certification (UK): U

Genre: Animation/Comedy/Adventure
UK Release date: 2^nd July 2010

Watched on Sky+ Monday 8^th August 2011.

PLEASE NOTE: THERE MAY BE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

I must admit that I have a bit of a soft spot for the Shrek films. I don’t know what it is; I guess I just like the brand of humour in them and (for the most part) the likable characters. The third one (I felt) was a bit of a mess, but they appear to have got it nearer the mark for the final instalment… until they decide to make some more, that is. I will give you my thoughts after this brief summary… sponsored by ‘Pete’s Potions’, available at all major ‘Fairy Godmother’ outlets nationwide.

Shrek is finding it hard to cope with the routine of everyday life, the children, the visitors, the tour bus… it’s all getting on top of him. This all comes to a head at the kids’ first birthday party where he has a big row with Fiona and storms out. He meets Rumpelstiltskin on the road and they start talking about their woes. Not knowing Rumpelstiltskin has an ulterior motive, Shrek signs a contract that sees him projected into an alternate reality, one in which he had never existed… until now. He finds that nobody knows him, not Donkey, not Puss in Boots… not even Fiona! It then dawns on Shrek that Rumpelstiltskin has conned him. Fortunately there’s a get-out clause in the contract, but can he fulfil it before sunrise? Of course, I’m not going to tell you here or them Spoiler Police will have me back on the farm working for that no good Old MacDonald.

Favourite Character – Puss in Boots (…made me laugh)

The animation is just what we’ve come to expect in these films, and, as usual, it is excellent. Just for reference, I stuck to my principles and watch it in 2D. As usual, some great tunes, particularly at the end, but generally, a decent score. All the usual voice talent was on show, and the all did a good job. So honourable mentions go to; Mike Myers as Shrek, Eddie Murphy as Donkey, Cameron Diaz as Princess Fiona and Antonio Banderas as Puss in Boots. I should also give a special mention for Walt Dohrn who did the voices for Rumpelstiltskin, Priest and Krekraw Ogre.

Favourite Quote – Donkey: “Wow, that’s a big kitty!... Can we keep him?”

I’m quite glad this franchise has reached an end, not because I think they’re no good any more, but I can see a day when that will be the case. As I’ve already said, I really get the humour in these films and I wish there were more comedies made in a similar vein. I half expected this one to be awful, if I’m honest, after the… let’s say… less than warm reception it got from the critics. It was a pleasant surprise to find it wasn’t all that bad. Yes, the Rumpelstiltskin character needed more development, but I didn’t really mind. It entertained me for ninety minutes and that’s all you can ask… Recommended.

My Score: 6.5/10

IMDb Score: 6.6/10 (30,431 votes when this review was written).
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0892791/

Rotten Tomatoes Score: 57/100 (187 reviews counted when this review was written).
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/shrek_4/

LINKS:
Official Site: http://www.shrek.com/
Trailer:

Film Review: THE OTHER MAN (2008)

Writer/Director: Richard Eyre
Running time: 85 mins (approx)
Certification (UK): 15

UK release date: 17th October 2008 (London Film Festival)

Watched on Sky+ Sunday 11th July 2010.

PLEASE NOTE: THERE MAY BE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

I read the write-up about this on the TV guide and it sounded intriguing, so I thought I’d give it a go. It’s a drama, set in London and Milan, about a man looking into the affairs of his wife after she has gone.

Peter’s wife, Lisa, has gone, he feels a great loss, but going through her things he discovers that she had been having an affair. His daughter, Abigail, is against him looking any further into it, she can see how it is hurting him, but he persists. Tracking the other man down to Milan, he goes there and befriends him in order to find out more about him. Eventually the truth has to come out, and this leads to a rather surprising ending.

The story is mostly told in flashback which can be a little confusing at times. Quite a slow pace, though, allows the audience time to absorb the narrative. Adequate performances from the main cast, Laura Linney as Lisa, Antonio Banderas as Ralph, Liam Neeson as Peter and Romola Garai as Abigail.

This is not the sort of film I would usually choose to watch and I found it a little intriguing, but not overly gripping. There is a twist towards the end that is pretty obvious from a long way off, but apart from that I don’t really have much to say about this one. A bit too slow for me, not recommended.

My score: 5.1/10

LINKS:
IMDb Site: http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0974613/
Trailer: http://uk.imdb.com/rg/VIDEO_PLAY/LINK/video/imdb/vi1295450649/

Film Review: THICK AS THIEVES (aka THE CODE) (2009)

Director: Mimi Leder
Running time: 104 mins (approx)
Certificate (UK): 15

Watched on Sky+ Sunday 1st November 2009.

PLEASE NOTE: POSSIBLE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

Keith Ripley is a notorious art thief who has been pursued by New York cop Lt. Weber for many years without any conviction. Ripley has more recently managed to avoid going to jail with the help of his god daughter, and lawyer, Alexandra Korolenko. As you might guess, Ripley has ties with the tight knit Russian community in New York.

Gabriel Martin is a young thief from Miami who is befriended by the veteran Ripley. Now, Ripley wants Martin to help him pull of an audacious robbery on a vault containing some priceless Russian artworks. He needs to do this in order to pay off a debt owed to the Russian mob by his former partner Victor Korolenko, Alexandra’s father. After meeting Alexandra, Gabriel pursues her despite Ripley’s warnings not to do so. The mob brings Ripley and Martin to meet the boss, known as Nicky. In order to ensure they carry out the job properly, Nicky arranges for Alexandra to be his guest until the goods are in his possession. This is where it gets interesting for our crooked duo.

A quite well made film, with New York as a backdrop you can’t go too far wrong with locations. Decent performances from all of the main characters, Morgan Freeman as Keith Ripley, Antonio Banderas as Gabriel Martin, Radha Mitchell as Alexandra Korolenko and Robert Forster as Lt. Weber, although none of them were really stretched. I guess in the end, although there was a major plot twist, which I didn’t really expect I found the film a little slow paced and dull. It just needed a little more action and maybe a little less dialogue. Over all, given the quality of the cast, I expected better.

My score: 6/10

LINKS:
IMDb Site: http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1112782/
Trailer: http://uk.imdb.com/rg/VIDEO_PLAY/LINK/video/imdb/vi1787036185/