Film Review: THE RAVEN (2012)

Director: James McTeigue
Writers: Ben Livingston, Hannah Shakespeare
Running time: 107 mins (approx)
Certification (UK): 15

Genre: Mystery/Thriller
UK Release date: 9^th March 2012

Watched on Sky+ Monday 18^th March 2013.

PLEASE NOTE: THERE MAY BE UNINTENTIONAL SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

To be honest, I can’t remember how this one ended up on my ‘To See’ list, but it is definitely there. I guess I must have been intrigued by the premise of it all. Sadly it doesn’t quite live up to expectations, but it does have a few good points amongst all the bad stuff on show. Here’s a very brief summary before I tell you just what I’m talking about.

The opening title card states “On October 7, 1849, Edgar Allan Poe was found, near death, on a park bench in Baltimore, Maryland. The last days of his life remain a mystery.” And this film gives an account of one of the many possible scenarios’ that lead to him sitting there. A series of murders based on Poe’s work have been committed and Edgar Allan Poe (John Cusack) himself is brought in to assist Detective Fields (Luke Evans) in his investigation. The gruesome murders are used initially to get Poe’s attention but then his fiancée, Emily Hamilton (Alice Eve) is kidnapped and things take a much more sinister turn. The following set of murders give clues to where Emily might be hidden… But can they unravel them in time? I think I’ll leave it there; don’t want to give the game away now.

On the plus side, it’s a pretty well made film with all the technical stuff, costumes and sets done very well. On the downside, the dialogue is terrible with everyone trying to sound like they’re straight from a Poe story or poem; it really didn’t work for me I’m afraid. This did have one positive side effect though; it gave John Cusack the opportunity to do some excellent scenery chewing over-acting; which I found quite funny in places. Sadly it’s a film that promised much but failed to deliver. I found I had no connection with any of the characters. I have not read much Poe and so I didn’t get many of the many nods to his work. Over all; quite disappointing.

SteelMonster’s verdict: NOT RECOMMENDED

My score: 5.3/10.

IMDb Score: 6.3/10 (based on 41,775 votes when this review was written).
http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1486192/

MetaScore: 44/100: (Based on 30 critic reviews provided by Metacritic.com at the time of going to press).

Rotten Tomatoes ‘Tomatometer’ Score: 23/100 (based on 128 reviews counted at the time of going to press).

Rotten Tomatoes ‘Audience’ Score: 47/100 (based on 98,688 user ratings counted at the time of going to press).
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/the_raven_2012/

If you’re crazy enough… You can find me on Facebook at:
http://facebook.com/andy.steel3

FAVOURITE QUOTES:
[first title card]
Title Card: On October 7, 1849, Edgar Allan Poe was found, near death, on a park bench in Baltimore, Maryland. The last days of his life remain a mystery.

Edgar Allan Poe: What's going on?
Detective Fields: I'm Detective Fields. Please, sit down, Mr. Poe.
Edgar Allan Poe: Yes. The infamous Detective Fields. Am I under arrest?
Detective Fields: No... not just yet.
Edgar Allan Poe: Then I'd rather stand! It makes it easier to leave!

Maddux: I believe that God gave him a spark of genius and quenched it in misery. But as far as something like this... The only thing he's ever killed is a bottle of brandy.

Edgar Allan Poe: Her innocence was the first part of her soul to die.

LINKS:
(Note: All were working at the time of going to press)
Trailer:

Film Review: GROSSE POINT BLANK (1997)

Director: George Armitage
Running time: 107 mins (approx)
Certificate (UK): 15

UK Release Date: 8th August 1997

Watched on Sky+ Sunday 13th June 2010.

PLEASE NOTE: POSSIBLE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

Remember back a few years when John Cusack used to make good films. You know, before he sold his soul and started to make not so good films like ‘2012’. Well, as part of a season of ‘Movies you never got round to watching but always wanted to see’ on one of the movie channels, this film came up. Well, I’d seen all the others they were showing and so I thought I’d better give it a viewing. Here’s a short summary followed by my thoughts.

Martin Blank is a hit man, he works freelance with his assistant Marcella doing the office work for him. One day Marcella tells him he’s been invited to his ten year school reunion. Martin is at first reluctant to go, but agrees when a job comes up in the area and his therapist, Dr. Oatman, tells him it would be a good idea. Unfortunately Martin has upset one of his rivals, Grocer, who is now stalking him using two government agents as a screen. Whilst in town for the reunion, Martin looks up his high school sweetheart, Debi Newberry, who works at the local radio station. After a bit of an awkward start the Debi agrees to go with him despite the fact the he didn’t turn up on their prom night ten years earlier. Throw in another assassin with a contract on Martin and we’ve got us a movie!

First of all, a really great soundtrack, The Clash, Motorhead, Queen, lots of great songs littered throughout. Pretty well made, but showing its age now just form the fact the mobile phones (or cell phones) have got so much smaller nowadays. Decent performances from all of the leading cast; John Cusack as Martin Q. Blank, Minnie Driver as Debi Newberry, Alan Arkin as Dr. Oatman, Dan Aykroyd as Grocer and Joan Cusack as Marcella.

This is a bit of an awkward one to assess; it starts out as a comedy, and then becomes a love story and then back to an action comedy for the grand finale. For me it works best as a comedy, I found the somewhat schmaltzy love story a bit of a distraction. I also kind of wasn’t all that convinced that Debi would have trusted Martin after what he did on prom night. But that may just be me. Over all, as I just said, I think it works better as a comedy than a love story, and it’s worth seeing for the satire alone. Recommended.

My score: 6.8/10

LINKS:
IMDb Site: http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0119229/

Film Review: 1408 [Director’s Cut] (2007)

Director: Mikael Håfström
Running time: 108 mins (approx)
Certificate (UK): 15

Watched on Sky+ Monday 4th January 2010.

PLEASE NOTE: POSSIBLE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

I have seen the theatrical cut of this film before and, to be honest, there’s not a lot added to the ‘Director’s cut’ version. Mike Enslin is an author who writes about scary hotels and such like. He has never seen a ghost and does not believe in such things as demons. Basically, he’s very cynical about the whole thing; however, his books are fairly successful.

One day, whilst going through his mail, Mike comes across a postcard from the Dolphin Hotel in New York. On the back of the card is the message “don’t enter 1408”. This intrigues him and, after having been at first rebuffed by the hotel, he gets his agent, Sam Farrell, to get him a night in that room. Arriving at the hotel, he is met by Gerald Olin, the manager and warned not to spend the night in that room. Despite a file full of evidence of murders, suicides and mysterious deaths, Mike insists that he stay in 1408. Eventually Olin relents and gives Mike the key. On entering he sees just a normal hotel room. Looking around, he describes the setting to his Dictaphone. Just when everything’s looking normal, the radio switches on, and then a picture appears crooked, and then a toilet roll end gets mysteriously folded. Thinking there must be someone else hiding in the room, Mike begins to search. He finds a lot more than he bargained for.

I haven’t read the Stephen King short story on which this movie is based, but I gather it’s somewhat better than the film. Quite well made with plenty of spooky special effects. Decent performances from the cast, John Cusack as Mike Enslin, Samuel L. Jackson as Gerald Olin, Mary McCormack as Lily (Enslin’s ex-wife) and Tony Shalhoub as Sam Farrell.

I guess the main problem, for me, was that the room didn’t really scare me. Yes, weird things happened, but I guess I didn’t care enough about Mike Enslin for it to affect me in any meaningful way. The action did get a bit too ‘off the wall’ towards the middle but the ending was pretty good. There was definitely something lacking though. Over all, a fair effort to make a scary film, but one that failed to hit the mark IMHO.

My score: 5.4/10

LINKS:
IMDb Site: http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0450385/
Official Site: http://www.1408-themovie.com/
Trailer: http://uk.imdb.com/rg/VIDEO_PLAY/LINK/video/screenplay/vi3115516185/

Film Review: 2012 (2009)

Director: Roland Emmerich
Running time: 158 mins (approx)
Certification (UK): 12A

Watched at the cinema Saturday 14th November 2009.

PLEASE NOTE: THERE MAY BE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

The Mayans predicted the world would end in the year 2012. Like many predictions of Earths’ destruction, it was forgotten until, in 2008, a scientist in India found the effect a massive solar flare was having on the Earth’s core. The radiation was acting like a microwave, destabilising the core and eventually the Earth’s crust. Governments were informed and plans were formed to save what they could of humanity… Those that could pay anyway.

During the destruction of the Earth we follow, amongst others, the fortunes of failed writer Jackson Curtis, his estranged wife and two children, and scientist, and government advisor, Adrian Helmsley. Having met Helmsley when Jackson takes the kids to Yellowstone for a holiday, our heroes take separate routes to salvation. It is apparent that something is up in Yellowstone and crazy reporter, Charlie Frost is on the case. Jackson meets Charlie and they discuss his theories. During this discussion Charlie lets out the fact that he has a map showing the location of giant ships being built by the governments of the world. To cut a long story short, when it all goes to hell in L.A., Jackson remembers the map and during their escape they manage to get to Yellowstone and retrieve it. Now desperate to get to China they luckily bump into Jackson’s boss, Russian billionaire Yuri Karpov, who happens to have a ticket for one of the ships. They manage to get to China where Jackson and his family are dumped by the greedy Russian. Meanwhile, Helmsley has been advising the president on how best to handle the crisis. Trying to persuade him to let the people know the world is about to end is quite a hard job! Eventually the president has a change of heart right at the last minute and decides to ‘Go down with the ship’, leaving his daughter escaping to China with Helmsley. There’s so much more to tell, but I’ll leave the plot here… I think you’ve had enough spoilers for one day!

Visually, the film is quite stunning; most of the effects are quite breathtaking on the big screen. Adequate performances from all of the major cast members, honourable mentions to John Cusack as Jackson Curtis, Amanda Peet as Kate Curtis, Chiwetel Ejiofor as Adrian Helmsley, Thandie Newton as Laura Wilson (The President’s daughter), Woody Harrelson as Charlie Frost and Danny Glover as President Thomas Wilson. I must admit I loved Woody Harrelson’s over-the-top cameo as Charlie Frost, worth seeing just that section of the movie alone.

I found the film exciting and, once all the destruction started, quite a roller coaster ride. Unfortunately, what let it down was the fact that it was just too long at 158 minutes and the fact the there were far far too many clichés in the storyline. It’s almost as if Roland Emmerich decided to put in bits of every other disaster movie ever made! Also, the story was a tad on the lame side, or have I just seen one too many disaster movies. Over all, a very good special effects movie that was let down by being a tad too long, had far too many clichés and had a storyline that was a little lame.

My score: 6.4/10

LINKS:
IMDb Site: http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt1190080/
Official Site: http://www.sonypictures.co.uk/movies/2012/
Trailer: http://uk.imdb.com/rg/VIDEO_PLAY/LINK/video/imdb/vi3444113945/

Film Review: IGOR (2008)

Director: Anthony Leondis
Running time: 85 mins (approx)
Certificate (UK): PG

Watched on Sky+ Monday 17th August 2009.

PLEASE NOTE: POSSIBLE SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW.

I like animated films that are witty and clever and this one hit both criteria pretty much bang in the centre. Everything from the story line to the cast was spot-on. I can’t really understand why it didn’t do so well at the box-office, but I guess I’m partly to blame as I’m one of those who didn’t go and see it at the cinema. Anyhow, let’s have a bit about the plot.

Igor lives in the land of Malaria, a dark place where the ever-present clouds bring a gloom to the people. Because he has a hunch on his back, it’s Igor lot to be an Igor, an assistant to an evil scientist, Dr. Glickenstein. Igor dreams of being an evil scientist, but is stuck in a bit of a rut. He has created two creatures, Scamper, a rabbit that can’t die and Brain, basically a rather dumb brain in a jar. An accident kills Dr. Glickenstein and Igor takes the opportunity to complete his ultimate evil plan, to create life! The team work together and create Eva, who turns out to be not quite as evil as anticipated. Meanwhile, Dr. Schadenfreude, another evil scientist has plans to take Eva and claim her as his own invention at the Evil Scientists Fair. Also, King Malbert is suspicious because he hasn’t seen Dr. Glickenstein in a while. Can Igor keep Eva safe from Dr. Schadenfreude while keeping the secret that Dr. Glickenstein is actually dead from King Malbert?

I really enjoyed this film, great animation and great performances from the voice talents of John Cusack as Igor, John Cleese as Dr. Glickenstein, Steve Buscemi as Scamper, Sean Hayes as Brain, Eddie Izzard as Dr. Schadenfreude, Jay Leno as King Malbert and Molly Shannon as Eva. Over all, a great one for the youngsters with plenty of jokes for the adults, a really likeable evil genius of a movie!

My score: 7/10

LINKS:
IMDb Site: http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0465502/
Official Site (UK): http://www.igormovie.co.uk/
Official Site (USA): http://igor-movie.com/